Expectations: An Update

Hello beautiful people!

In January I met my goal for monthly blog posts and wrote 7 of them. Then in February was when I started feeling sick all the time and basically spent my time doing as little as possible – and posted here a total of three times. In March I was hoping to feel a bit better, but that was slow in coming, so thus far I’ve put up three posts again – this will make four!

Anyways, I figured it was about time I wrote an update that was less vague about why I’ve been so absent much of this year. The answer is actually really simple… nearly constant morning sickness and fatigue has been really really awful to deal with.


Looking forward to a new chapter!

That’s right. The Husband and I are expecting a little one! He or she is due in September (9/19/19 to be exact) and we are so excited and nervous and thrilled, and really just every emotion in the book plus some more.

Exciting as the news is though; my first trimester was really hard on me. I already have trouble eating enough as a non-pregnant human, so add on the fact that I needed to be upping my calorie intake plus I was feeling sick almost all the time and I was just miserable for several weeks. Thankfully I never had to miss a day of work, but I was a zombie there and then either slept or was laid out on the couch the rest of the time. Basically, February was rough, y’all.

But March has been a million times better. I’m finally back to being able to cook dinner, go to social events, get basic stuff around the house done, and actually eat enough! I’m out of the first trimester now, so I’m really hopeful that April is going to be even better and I can finally get things back in order a little bit – at least until this tiny human arrives!


This photo represents the feeling I’m trying to encapsulate during this pregnancy. Photo by Casey Horner on Unsplash

Besides all the pregnancy hormones though, just not being able to get up and do the things I usually do took a pretty hefty toll on my mental health. I need my sunshine (not that there was much of that anyways) and I need to feel at least somewhat productive. Last weekend I was finally able to spend a few hours with my horse on a lovely sunny day and that was a big thing in helping me get my mood back on track. Seasonal depression is a thing, you guys! Take care of yourselves!

I’ve had a bit more anxiety too, but I think a lot of that can honestly be attributed to pregnancy hormones. I mean, I don’t know what I’m doing here, I don’t know how to take care of a baby and I’m pretty terrified of what my life is going to look like after he or she gets here, whether I’ll be able to keep working full time, what our living situation will look like, etc, etc, and so on and so forth. Legitimate concerns, but of course, my brain will blow everything out of proportion. I did finally start taking an herbal supplement that has been helping, which I’m super happy about too!

My life is starting to look a lot different than it did even three or four months ago, but I’m adjusting, we’re learning how our relationship is changing, and I am falling in love with this season of my life! I’m very hopeful that I’ll be able to get back into the swing of writing without too much trouble and that my mental and physical health both will stay reasonable stable.

Next up, a look at how I’m doing with my goals, and how they may shift in the near future… See you then!

Love and kindness!

Katharine Marie

Posted by Katharine Espinosa

Katharine is a freelance writer, editor, and aspiring author. She loves coffee, chocolate, cats, and riding her horses on the weekends. She lives in rural Texas with her husband and daughter.

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