Wishes and Desires

Hello beautiful wonderful people!

In my mind, which is probably closer to some kind of fantasy dreamland than the actual world, I tend to think that everyone is on some kind of journey towards self-improvement. I have this idea that everyone is unhappy or dissatisfied with some aspect of themselves.

In reality I doubt that is actually the case. I work in customer service – I know there are a lot of narcissistic people in this world and people that can’t handle being wrong. It’s just the way people are and there’s not a whole lot one can do about it.

But regardless of other people, I do know myself, and I tend to be unhappy or dissatisfied with either myself or my life on a pretty regular basis. By now, I’ve worked through enough that I can now say that I have areas that need improvement, not that I’m a terrible person or whatever other horrible thing I used to tell myself.

And there are a whole lot of areas that could use some improvement. So I’m constantly on a self-improvement journey, constantly analyzing what I want to do differently.


So for whatever reason today, I decided to write up some of the things that I wish were part of my life or what type of person I wish I was. Maybe its kind of a weird thing to write about, but depending on how I go about it, it could be a good thing. This isn’t a list of all the dreams I have for my life, this is a collection of logical improvements or life choices that I can further pursue.

I want to be a kinder, more empathetic person who desires to bring a smile to every person I come across.

I wish I was more determined, more driven to pursue the things I care about instead of being afraid to make a move so much of the time.

I want to be a better communicator who doesn’t always find it so incredibly difficult to talk about feelings and real life issues.

I want to have the time to spend on my horse hobby again, where I can actually pursue competitive goals and improve my skills. And on that vein, I also want to have the ability to keep my horses at home instead of a 20 minute one-way commute.

I wish I was more productive in general. Not necessarily that I want to get a million things done in a day, but I would like to be more consistent about everyday things.

I wish my health was better and I really want to work on that – it isn’t that I’m really looking for new answers, but that I’ve never been able to keep up with the work it takes to actually improve things. One of these days I want to actually keep up with it.

I want to have a stronger desire to stay in touch with my friends, to actually work on relationships instead of running away every time I get tired or don’t really feel like talking.

I wish I was the person who actually sent out thank you cards instead of planning to and never doing it.

I wish I was better at following through on my commitments.

Yes, I definitely have a follow-up to this post coming soon. I’ve been swamped with a lot of things lately and it’s brought up some interesting thought processes that I want to work through. So until then…

Love and kindness!

Katharine Marie

Posted by Katharine Espinosa

Katharine is a freelance writer, editor, and aspiring author. She loves coffee, chocolate, cats, and riding her horses on the weekends. She lives in rural Texas with her husband and daughter.

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