Soapbox Moment

Happy Friday lovelies!

I can now say that I’ve made it through my first week back at work after maternity leave. In some ways it is nice to be back at work but I am more than ready to have a whole weekend to spend with my baby girl.

Navigating my life postpartum has been pretty rough and I’ve found myself rather frustrated with the world on more than one occasion. Human nature and the culture of our world are not always kind or conducive to healing, at least not in the way I think they should be.


For one, I have felt such a strong pressure to bounce back from the pregnancy/childbirth experience and get back to the life and productivity level that I had before. I put a lot of this pressure on myself, of course, but so much of it is because of the culture that we live in. I only had six weeks off from work, so of course I felt pressured to get everything back to “normal” during that time period.  Needless to say, nothing is remotely back to normal. And in my heart (and logically) I know that it is totally okay not to bounce back like that.

This culture, at least in America, has definitely latched onto the idea of self care/loving yourself and your body/etc. and yet somehow those things, which are fantastic on their own, are also becoming a means to an end… and that end is the extreme productivity and busyness that is now the ultimate goal of our society. Taking time out for yourself and setting boundaries are still generally frowned upon, even though for me they would definitely fall under the umbrella of “self care”.

Since my baby was born I’ve leaned heavily into my spiritual side again and I’ve started digging into some ancient cultures and traditions, searching for something, even though I’m not sure what exactly that something is. Maybe something that makes me feel better about my aversion to those extremes in today’s society. This is a topic that deserves it’s own post (or series of posts) but I love learning about how culture used to revolve much more strongly around seasons and routines, all of it much more in tune with how nature and the earth really work. The way culture is today practically laughs in the face of all of those ideas, but in reality, which image would be healthier if we were to actually compare them? I wonder about that a lot… and I may end up digging into it some more in the future. This is definitely a topic for another time.

I am someone who is very keen on love being a key component to every aspect of life, but even I find myself becoming irate with humanity and society far too often. Particularly working as a customer service rep, it’s so easy for me to see the negatives about people more often than I would like. Even writing this post, which I had listed on my calendar as a “rant about humanity” is hard for me because it involves actually looking at those negatives when I’m so used to pushing out positive vibes wherever I can.

Perhaps its important to look at both sides, the negative AND the positive, and come to an agreement that we don’t have to block out those negative aspects just to create a positive outlook. I can acknowledge that people are just plain stupid sometimes and I can realize that some people are mean just because they can be, not because of some extenuating circumstances. But even after acknowledging those things, I can still something to be positive about because those people, no matter how stupid, idiotic, or mean they are, do not have power over my own attitude. Humanity might devolve and society might be a wreck, but that isn’t enough for me to give up on it. I still want to see the best in people and I still want to be part of whatever community is still decent and good in this world.

This post is really a rant about nothing in particular. Maybe it’s just a bunch of words that are an attempt to explain my desire to break away from today’s world because something inside me feels out of place. Whatever it is, take from it whatever you will – most people I talk to usually agree that something is missing from our lives. That something is probably different for you than it is for me but we’re all on a journey to find it. So this is me wishing you luck on your journey as I trek down the path of my own.

Love and kindness,

Katharine Marie

Posted by Katharine Espinosa

Katharine is a freelance writer, editor, and aspiring author. She loves coffee, chocolate, cats, and riding her horses on the weekends. She lives in rural Texas with her husband and daughter.

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