Setting Goals

Thoughts and Ideas About 2021

Hello beautiful humans,

I’m ridiculously proud of myself for posting two weeks in a row, even if it took convincing the child that a nap was, in fact, needed to get the chance to sit down and write. Why do I feel like the bar is extremely low for me right now? Rhetorical question, please don’t answer that.

Anyhow, last week I rambled on about how life had been over the past few months or so, and mentioned that I wanted to talk a little about the things I wanted to do this year. So let’s talk about it! Continue reading →

Posted by katharine_marie in Life in 2021, Setting Goals, 0 comments

October At Last

Hello, beautiful darlings,
You have no idea how happy I am that its October. And that is for quite a few reasons.

First off, I just love October. It might be my favorite month of the year (not 100% sure, but pretty close) and I always look forward to it. It’s funny because first, I wanted our wedding to be in October. That didn’t work out, so then I wanted our baby to be born in October. That didn’t happen either, so now I’m just settled into having October as my month. Which is actually quite nice, now that I’m thinking about it. I don’t have to share it with anyone, I can enjoy the weather and the autumn joy without any expectations. Things always turn out just right, don’t they? Continue reading →

Posted by katharine_marie in Life in 2020, Lifestyle, mental health, Parenting, Setting Goals, 0 comments

starting fresh

Hello dear readers,

The last few posts I’ve written have felt kind of heavy. Usually, I try not to do that many in a row, but between the world lately and everything I’ve been working through and processing internally, it would have felt fake to try and post something more upbeat or lighter in nature. That isn’t to say that I’ve been depressed and miserable for the last month. It’s actually been quite a good summer overall! But I do try to write about the real and the raw aspects of life, and things have definitely been VERY real lately.

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Photo by Jez Timms on Unsplash

So the short version of the story is that I’ve been doing a lot of internal processing lately. 2020 has been a really strange year and I’ve found myself breaking out of the box I had previously put myself into in so many ways. I’ve found the courage to state my opinions and beliefs, to actually speak with people more boldly than I ever would have before, and it has been really really freeing. But in the same breath, it has been so very hard because I overthink every little thing and having disagreements with people is something that I have always avoided with a passion.

But I know, in my heart, that I’m not making mistakes in my life, that I’m just coming home to myself and owning who I am in a whole new light. I’m recognizing my faults and my bad habits and in doing so, I’m motivated to overcome them. I’m focused on loving the people around me, and in doing so, I’m learning how to love myself all over again. I’ve had the right intentions for so very long, but I’ve been blind to how I was blocking myself from really reaching my dreams or how I was dividing and hurting other people, which was the exact opposite of what I wanted!

Tracking my moods and my habits in my planner has been absolutely invaluable in helping me realize when I’m being selfish and when I’m being selfLESS, two things that get tangled sometimes in my mind (odd as that may sound). Making my opinions known is different from arguing with someone and in trying to stand up for what I believe, I was becoming resentful and bitter, all because I was going about it the wrong way. (I’m still figuring out the right way for ME, so I’ll keep you updated lol.)

I’m getting used to saying it out loud, but I’m a very empathic person. It’s a blessing and a curse at the same time, and I’ve really come to terms lately with the fact that I was not dealing with it very well at all. I never truly understood how much my empathic tendencies were taking over every minute of every day, or how much I was feeding off of other people. And that isn’t healthy. Not at all! I’ve had to take a step back from people in general and do some work on me before I can even think about helping others in the same way.

There are a lot of things that have contributed to me being in a place to write this blog post and a lot of things that I want to discuss moving forward, but I’ll get to those in the future. All I want to say right now is that I am deeply sorry if I have hurt or offended anyone. I never wanted to spread anything but love and I’m so upset that I’ve done otherwise. My beliefs may not change, but I am working on changing my actions, which I hope will become self-evident.

I won’t be posting this Friday and it’s deliberate this time, not just because of a hectic schedule. I need some time to recharge and I’m also way behind on planning blog posts for the rest of 2020. So I’ll be working on that as well. But next week is August and I’ll be back full force!


Much love and lots of light to everyone,

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Posted by katharine_marie in Anxiety, Depression, General, Life in 2020, Lifestyle, mental health, Setting Goals, 0 comments

and miles to go before I sleep

Hello beautiful wonderful readers!

So an odd fact about me is that my social media feeds tend to be completely different depending on the platform… my Facebook page is full of actual friends, people I know, etc, etc. My Instagram page is specially curated to only show me beautiful horses, lovely spiritual routines, inspiring birth stories, and a few other topics or celebrities that I enjoy seeing. No surprise, I scroll through Facebook periodically to see what’s going on with people I know, but I spend 98% of my time on Instagram because I can come away feeling inspired, empowered, and happy. Nobody is fighting about wearing masks or their politics on my Instagram feed and I LOVE it.

But the reason I mention my social media feeds is that I follow quite a few travel bloggers. I adore traveling and don’t get to do it as often as I would like, so I tend to live vicariously through others (particularly right now with a small child). And at the moment, with all the restrictions and shelter-in-place stuff, basically nobody else is traveling either. This means that my lovely Instagram feed is lacking in the department of beautiful travel photos. It’s a tragedy.

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Exploring a castle in the middle of Germany, back in 2015.

So to satisfy my wanderlust, I’ve been daydreaming about vacations and getaways and traveling. Originally I had planned to take a nice vacation sometime this year, and then COVID happened, so I thought, maybe we just have a weekend getaway later in the fall. But Texas is still being stupid and we’re still avoiding people as much as possible, so it has been agreed that all traveling is off the table until next year.


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The Flam Valley – Photo courtesy of Wikipedia Commons/Andrew Bowden

I would love to spend a week relaxing in the Flam Valley in Norway, admiring the mountains and walking along the river. Just enjoying the peaceful nature of a small village and the beautiful views of the country. Norway is definitely pretty high on our list of countries to visit in the future.

Okay, I just love waterfalls. And I’ve never been lucky enough to see any big ones in real life. I keep looking at photos of the ones in Croatia and I’m a little obsessed. Seriously, how gorgeous are these things? And they just happen naturally?! Swoon.

 

We were originally supposed to go visit the Prince Edward Island/Nova Scotia last year, but I ended up having some issues with my citizenship and had to cancel the trip (booo) but I’m still holding out for that trip to happen soon. The red dirt cliffs, the lighthouses, etc. I want to bike around the island and just enjoy the scenery.

This photo is of Iceland, but honestly, I think anywhere I could see the Northern Lights would be awesome. I don’t necessarily like the cold all that much, but I’ll buy a parka or something and be okay, right? Alaska, Iceland, whatever. Just somewhere I can see the beautiful sights of the northern part of the globe and experience those beautiful fantastical lights!

Where do you want to travel to as soon as travel restrictions are lifted?!

Love, light, and kindness,

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Posted by katharine_marie in Life in 2020, Setting Goals, 0 comments

2020 Quarter Two Update

Hello, lovelies!

Let’s be real – how is it almost July already? I did a double-take earlier this week when I looked at my blogging schedule and saw this recap on there. Time moves so fast.

When I wrote my Quarter One update, we were just seeing the beginning stages of the disaster that is a world pandemic (here in Texas anyway, I know that other places were already being hit hard). I don’t think any of us had any idea that we would still be dealing with this chaos three months later.

With that in mind though, my perspective has shifted, and I’m eyeing my goals/objectives for this year with a different thought process. I had plans to do all sorts of things this spring, but none of that happened. Some are just off the table for 2020 altogether, and some are just pushed to the fall. Hopefully.

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2020 Objectives: The Top Three

For this year, I had three main objectives… improve my home and social life, find ways to work from home, and start riding my horse again.

Our home life is actually quite lovely right now. The Husband stayed home on furlough for six weeks and it was an interesting time. We really enjoyed the extra family time and he got to be there and watch the kiddo pulling up and crawling for the first time. It’s hard to believe she only started doing that less than two months ago – she’s a beast now, and fast!

The lockdown/quarantine/stay at home/whatever thing has really blocked my efforts at overcoming social anxiety. The less opportunity I have to interact with people, the less comfortable I am doing it. I’ve reached the point now where I find it easier to stay home and never speak to anyone ever again. Not ideal, so it’s something I’ll need to work on again. Once I actually leave the house. If that ever happens.

While this month has been slow, I stayed pretty busy with work during the other two months of this quarter, which was a really nice bonus. I chose to go back to school this year, so its been hard to really make headway on creating my own home business apart from my side job, but I think it’s a good situation for the time being.

The third main objective I had for this year was to get back into riding again, and its definitely been happening! Besides a handful of weeks where the weather was just too terrible to be outside, I’ve been able to get out to the farm at least two-three times a week this quarter. I’m feeling very out of shape and all that, but I’ve been riding consistently and that feels great!

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2020 Objectives: All the Rest of Life

I’ve been able to read more, although my motivation comes in spurts, but I’ve gotten through several books, both fiction and nonfiction. I’m thinking of doing a reading list blog post sometime this summer yet!

It’s been difficult to be consistent with my daily spiritual practices the last while. The Tiny Princess went through a spurt of no longer wanting to sleep at night so I slept in during the mornings whenever I could, and then she started waking up at 6-7am regularly, and sorry, but I am not the person who gets up at 5:30 just to have some quiet time. Even if it does help me start my day better. She’s finally evening out her sleep schedule again and I finally have my mornings back so yay!

A few things that I had on my list are just on hold for the time being because of COVID. I’m not scheduling anything with the dentist just yet, we haven’t gotten together with friends, or gone on any sort of vacation or trip yet. I’m hoping we can still plan a weekend trip sometime in the fall, but a full vacation is definitely off the table until next year at least.

I mentioned this already last time, but I did go back to school! I’m attending Southern New Hampshire University and getting my degree in Creative Writing – its a fully online setup with 8 week terms, and so far I’ve finished my first two classes with top grades! I start my next class on Monday and its very exciting and fun for me.

We’re also closer and closer to being able to buy a house! I’m going to go out on a limb and say we’ll probably start lightly shopping early in the fall sometime. Things will depend a little on how quickly we can get qualified for something and then of course, how soon we find something that we like! It’s an exciting thing!


Despite the chaos that 2020 has been already, we’re not in bad shape by any means. There are rougher days and more discouraging days, but I’m still trying to think positive thoughts as much as humanly possible!

Until next week,

Love, light, and kindness, even when it’s hard to see!

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Posted by katharine_marie in Life in 2020, Setting Goals, 0 comments

Silk + Sonder Planner Review

Hi beautiful dreamers!

Starting on Friday, we’ll get into some review posts, but today I wanted to pop in and tell you all about the new planner system I started using this month. Actually, “tell” is kind of a boring word – I’m going to rave a little bit.

I mentioned it on my social media pages back at the beginning of the month but on a whim, I gave into a handful of Instagram ads that had been pushing their way into my feed. One of those impulse ad-related purchases was a Silk + Sonder planner/journal.

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These planners are insanely pretty. They’re beautiful simplistic with well-placed accents to make them feel unique. The design work is just lovely overall – granted, I’ve only seen the June version in person, but there are plenty of video reviews from previous months, so it’s not just this month, it’s all the months.

Yes, months. This is a subscription-based planner. Silk + Sonder ships out a new planner/journal every month with a new theme so that you can start fresh each time. That factor on its own was what really drew me in. I love fresh starts and I tend to drag my planners around everywhere with me, so after a few months, they tend to look a bit ragged and then I start to lose interest. This is the last week of June and my S+S planner is still gorgeous. There are grease stains on one page and I’ve gotten a handful of pages a little sticky (thanks to the child, there are a lot of sticky surfaces around here). I definitely haven’t lost interest yet and the majority of the booklet looks brand new.

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The first portion of the booklet has a few calendar pages, just to give an overview of what’s happening big-picture style in your life. Then comes the tracker pages: moods, habits, gratitude. I have so much fun sitting down in the evening with my colored pencils and filling these in!

Next is the part that I’ve found more challenging to work with: the journaling section. June’s theme was “Choice” and there’s a spread of questions about setting boundaries in my life that are very thought-provoking and well-timed, at least for me.

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One of the cutest pages is the Self-Care Bingo page. It’s just plain adorable, but also a great page to go for inspiration when I feel the need to do something fun or treat myself.

There’s a couple of recipes, a coloring page, and then we get into what would be considered the “planner” portion of the journal. And let me tell you, this thing has everything I ever wanted: a shopping list section, a meal planner/tracker, goal setting, mental health, a mini habit tracker, and a spot for inspiration. It’s the perfect blend of journaling and planning, but much easier to work with than most other options out there.

If you love the idea of traditional bullet journaling, but find that its a lot of effort and it’s hard to make it work well for you (that’s how I am), then this might work out really well for you. I find that it has the right amount of structure combined with free space to keep me inspired and motivated. Honestly, this is the most productive and motivated month I’ve had in a very long time.

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I use the extra note pages for a variety of things: brainstorming meals for the week, notes from my therapy sessions, random ideas that pop into my head, whatever. I’ve been playing around with making little boxes to contain all these things, but it’s still a work in progress to see what I like best.

I’ve been recommending this planner to basically everyone I talk to, which is a testament to how much I love it. At first, I was going to hold off on making this post until I had been using it for two or three months, but I’m so obsessed already that I went ahead and did it now. I’m not getting paid to say this – I really just love it that much. Haha!

At almost $20 a month, it definitely is more pricey than other planner options, but I think it’s worth the mini splurge if it boosts my creativity AND productivity. My birthday present to myself is probably going to be the 12-month subscription if nothing changes between now and then. Even my husband thinks it is worth the extra money at this point! Plus, supporting a small business?! Win-win all around!

Side note: during lockdown, this lovely company started a new line of journals for kids! Obviously, my kiddo isn’t old enough yet, but in a few years, I’ll definitely be getting her a subscription of her own!

Silk + Sonder Website

Silk + Sonder Instagram

Silk + Sonder Kids


Love, light, and happiness all around!

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Posted by katharine_marie in Book Reviews, Books & Writing, General, Life of a Writer, Lifestyle, mental health, Setting Goals, 0 comments

5 ways to cope with stress

This post is up later than I had planned because I wrote it and got it ready to go and then promptly forgot to actually post it. Whoops.

Hello wonderful readers!

I hope everyone is still managing to stay safe and healthy through the pandemic – it’s definitely not easy! I take precautions whenever I have to go get groceries, and I hate wearing masks because hello! claustrophobia! But I keep reminding myself that this will only be temporary. One day, hopefully not too long from now, we won’t have to worry so much about being around other humans again. Won’t that be nice? I just want an evening out or to be able to go to the movies. Very silly things, but I’m allowed to feel a little selfish sometimes, I think.

Even though my personal life has only changed a little bit, I still find that my anxiety levels have been higher. The main reason, of course, is the uncertainty and the unpredictability. Husband has been on furlough for just over a month now and even though we have been and are still financially stable, it’s the uncertainty that stresses me out – not knowing when that consistent paycheck will be back. As someone who likes to plan ahead, I’ve definitely been forced to sit back and just take it one day at a time.

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Photo by Max Kleinen on Unsplash

Everyone has different ways of dealing with their stress and coping with the chaos that is the world right now. And even if we take the pandemic situation completely off the table, we still all deal with these feelings at some time or other. I sometimes find it interesting to see how others handle anxiety because its usually slightly different than mine – even The Dear Husband has some anxieties as well and he deals with it in a vastly different way than I would. It’s kind of fascinating, or it would be if I wasn’t talking about STRESS. Hahaha…

Breathing is one of the things I do the most. (I mean, duh.) There are a million techniques to calm anxieties with the breath alone – like the 4-7-8 method, for example. Just simple deep breathing is helpful though, nothing special.

Grounding can also help pull my mental state out of whatever funk I was in before. My current technique is a 54321 idea, where you identify 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. It can be very helpful to just refocus on the immediate surroundings and bring yourself back into the moment.

Singular Focus. If I find that I’m so stressed I can’t even focus on the above grounding technique though, I’ll focus instead on only one of my senses at a time, either by burning a candle or incense so that my sense of smell is activated or by listening to music as a way to bring my mind back whenever it wanders across the line into chaotic territory.

Writing things down is one technique that my therapist constantly reminds me to do as well. Free-writing or association isn’t easy for me as a very precise writer, but I’ve been taking the time to practice because sometimes it really does help to braindump, and having the option is great.

Acceptance can also be a way to overcome some of the really tough spots. Denying the negative feelings that come up doesn’t really help because it doesn’t deal with them, it merely shuts them up in a box and puts them away. Acknowledging that “yes, I am angry and that’s okay” can really provide a chance to FEEL that emotion and then maybe uncover a way to move past it. This is also something that is super hard for me because I don’t like negative feelings so I beat myself up over them and can never move past them. The handful of times that I’ve actually sat down and acknowledged that I was feeling guilty or sad and allowed myself the chance to just be with those emotions for a little bit, I’ve been able to process and work through them much better.

Obviously, none of these are perfect ways to overcome stress and anxiety, but they are definitely good ways to cope and start working through some of the issues. With all the chaos in the world right now, I think everyone is going through some added stress, and it is far too easy to let things turn into a vicious cycle which can then be difficult to break free from. But identifying the issue is sometimes half the battle. We can do this!


Love, light, and kindness,

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Posted by katharine_marie in Anxiety, General, Life in 2020, Life of a Writer, Lifestyle, mental health, Setting Goals, 0 comments

2020 Quarter One Update

Hello lovely readers,

Somehow we’ve reached the point where we do review posts, and despite the insanity that the world right now, I want to go ahead and put these up. I don’t think anyone expected 2020 to take this direction, but we’re here now so we might as well make the best of it, right?

Since this is a look at how the first quarter of the year has gone, I’m going to cover the list of objectives I made for 2020 and see what’s happened in the past three months. And, because I’m practicing positive focus, I’m going to look ahead a little too.

2020 Objectives

The top three things on my list for this year were my home life, my own business, and my horses. I can’t say my house is really any cleaner, but I do think in a lot of ways it is happier and less stressful, and that is something I’m pleased about. Keeping our home as a safe space for us means we have more energy to help others, which is something I want to do more of in the future.

I haven’t exactly started my own business yet, but for the first time, I’m actually making some decent income from my writing and that is exciting in and of itself! I’ve been loving my little side jobs and I think I’m still reeling a bit from the fact that I’m actually a good enough writer to do this.

We’ve had a few setbacks from the rain and the mucky weather, but otherwise, I’ve been spending way more time with my horse than I have in a long while. I’m really enjoying it. Especially now that I’m a stay at home mom, ‘me time’ is even more important, and riding is just that. I have a lot of ambitions about hauling out to do some shows and endurance work and whatnot, but at this point, it’s a matter of seeing what gets canceled/postponed/rescheduled. My horse saw the vet yesterday and she is proclaimed in great shape for her age – we have his approval to go ahead with all my plans!

I had a list of other things I was hoping would come to fruition this year… some are definitely happening, others are still on the fence. Without much work, while we wait for COVID-19 to pass, it’s hard to continue saving money or planning any new trips so I’m not sure how those things will play out. I have been working to cook new meals every so often, and I have a nice little morning devotional routine that usually happens if I get up on time.

I did end up going back to school – halfway through my first course right now and we already went to our first film festival of the year! Even though I haven’t done well with blogging in March, the first two months of 2020 were great (7 posts each in January and February!) so I’ll just need to get back into a routine.

Again, apart from the last few weeks, I’ve actually been quite happy with how blogging has gone this year. I’ve stuck to the schedule I made instead of constantly making stuff up last minute, for once!


I’m honestly still a little wary of 2020 at this point. Being a US election year means it was already all sorts of insane, and currently The Husband is home and we are self-isolating until… I don’t know when exactly? I know there are so many other things that have happened this year already and it’s only March. I want to say that it can only get better, but I feel like that’s asking for trouble!

If I focus inward, my personal life has been pretty great this year. I have relationships with my family and friends that are better than ever (I think). I have been blessed enough to have opportunities to really focus on healing myself and pursue my goals and dreams. Even if the world feels like it’s falling apart, I still have plenty of things to be thankful for. We can all probably find something, or a few things, to be happy about, even during this dark period.


Love, LOTS of light, and much kindness,

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Posted by katharine_marie in Life in 2020, mental health, Setting Goals, 0 comments

My Morning Routine

Hello beautiful dreamers!

I can honestly say that I’m in a little bit of panic right now because I pulled up Friday’s post to work on yesterday and realized that this is the end of February. How?!? I just don’t understand where the time is going. Someone please stop it before this gets out of control.

Last week, I rambled a bit about how it’s been hard to figure out routines now that I’m staying at home, and I talked a bit about how I maintain my sanity by having a morning routine that I’m usually able to do before the Princess wakes up.

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Maybe I could use that time – usually about an hour and a half – to catch up on the chores around the house or whatever, but since I consider that to be MY time, I only do things that I want to do.

I make my coffee and spent some time reading a few chapters of Scripture and/or working on whatever other spiritual study I’m in. I take my time with this, sometimes I spend extra time meditating or journaling, or whatever I feel called to on any given day. I probably should eat breakfast too, but I’m not usually hungry at this hour in the morning, so that tends to wait until later. Depending on how well the munchkin slept, I may take a shower too – sometimes when she hasn’t slept well, I don’t like to get in the shower in case she wakes up.

Basically, I’m using this portion of my time to ground myself and mentally prepare myself to handle the day. Not saying it always works to get me through the day in a good mood, but it sure does help!

I try to have all that done before 7am, so that I can spend the next little while working on blog posts!! Doing this is really the only way I’ve been able to keep up with the blog while taking care of the Princess – I would never get it done consistently throughout the day and my evenings are too unpredictable most of the time. I try to write or edit at least one post per day and that usually gets done.

Some days the Princess wakes up at 7:45 so my blogging time gets cut a little short, and other days she sleeps till almost 8:30. Those days I usually do a little extra on a post and then try to get the dishwasher emptied or tidy up from the day before if I didn’t do it before going to bed.

The most important thing is that I get some time alone to spend with my thoughts and enjoy some of my favorite things without the added layer of stress.

How do you keep your sanity on a day to day basis?  I know it’s a definite necessity for me!!


Love, light, and loads of kindness,

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Posted by katharine_marie in Creative Writing, General, Life in 2020, Lifestyle, mental health, Setting Goals, 0 comments

routines at home

Hey there wonderful dreamers!

Today marks four weeks – basically a month since I left my full time job to stay home with the Tiny Princess. it’s been a huge blessing and a pretty big shift in our lives. but it’s been really really good, despite everything.

There’s a lot i could talk about on this subject, and I have shared some on social media, but today I wanted to talk about some of the things I’ve been doing to help schedule out my time at home so that I can feel the most productive and take care of both Adaline AND myself in the best way possible.

Note that I said the goal was to FEEL more productive, not necessarily BE more productive. This is an important note. Mental attitude is everything. I am awful at minimizing the things I do get done in favor of stressing over all the things I didn’t. My therapist and I have talked at length about this and it’s something I have a hard time with, but it’s slowly getting better. I’m learning to see each day as it’s own unit instead of comparing it to yesterday or last week or whatever.

Sometimes, when I look at the last few weeks, it seems like it’s just been one thing after the other. First I had to decompress a little from the stress of my previous routine. Then the teething switched into overdrive meaning I could hardly set the poor girl down for very long at one time. Then one by one we all got some variation of a cold and in the middle of that, it felt like nobody slept for at least a week – in reality it was probably about four or five days where she refused to sleep anywhere that wasn’t upright on my shoulder. So that was fun. The Husband and I are kind of almost recovered now and the Princess is feeling much better too.

At first, it felt like I was still playing catch-up with the house. Just could not get to everything in one day. Now, everything actually feels more or less in order and I can do little things throughout the day to keep the place clean and tidy. That in and of itself is a huge stress reliever for me – I’m not exactly a neat person, but chaos annoys me to no end.

Anyways, most days I’m able to get up by 6:30am and I have a pretty good morning routine going on – something that I’m going to explore in more depth next week! – that I can usually get done before the kid wakes up. That 1-2 hours in the morning is my sanity right there. Maybe some moms can do it, but I just can’t handle never ever being alone. The Husband leaves before 6 and she usually doesn’t get up until at least 7:30, usually later, and that window of time is MINE.

That morning routine, though, is probably the only consistent part of the day. Her naps are a little all over the place because I think we’re in some sort of transition period, and everything else is usually all up in the air. But that’s just the way life is right now, I suppose!

How is your life going right now? Hopefully a little less chaotic-feeling than mine!


Love, light, and loads of kindness!

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Posted by katharine_marie in Anxiety, General, Life in 2020, Life of a Writer, mental health, Parenting, Setting Goals, 0 comments