wedding

One Year On

Hi there, lovely readers!

I’m making an exception today and writing about someone else – I try to protect the people in my life by using very few pictures or details about them.

But Sunday is my wedding anniversary and I can’t let it go by without saying at least a few things about this past year and my husband, who has turned out to be quite fantastic, if I’m allowed to brag just a little bit.

This time last year I honestly had no idea what I was getting myself into. I had so many fears and doubts and I was still absolutely terrified of the idea of a life-long commitment. As someone who has anxiety about so many things, it was easy to get caught up in the aspect of just how huge this promise was that I was making to someone else.

But even though I was (and still kind of am) a little phobic about commitment, it never occurred to me not to go through with marrying Juan. Everything I was scared of held absolutely no significance compared to how much I wanted him in my life. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was my person and he always would be.

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He’s quite handsome too. That helped a lot.

That day, a year ago, was the best day of my life. Over the last year I’ve become a lot less terrified, probably because once I went through with it, there was no longer any choice to be anxious about. I might worry that I’m messing things up or not fulfilling my side of the relationship, but I’m not worried about whether or not I made the right choice. I am still 100% certain about that fact.

Learning how to live and communicate with someone else has been a huge learning curve – and don’t think I’m anywhere near figuring it out. I had a roommate before we got married but that was entirely different of course. I didn’t have to think about how messy her side of the closet was or whether she was going to expect me to cook dinner when I got off work. Quite a different arrangement with a husband that you can’t exactly get away from!

Since I’m not a great communicator to begin with, it’s taken me a long while to learn how to handle some things. I avoid conflict like the plague normally, but when avoiding isn’t exactly an option? I might have had more than a few irrational moods and emotional meltdowns. Not great, I know.

I should probably actually check in with Juan on this point, but I would like to say that I’ve been able to relax and ease up a little bit and I don’t cause arguments quite as often as I did at one time. But I also know I still have a LOT to work on, don’t worry!

Those are more of the negative things though and really, this past year has been fabulous in so many ways. It still amazes me just how well we get along and are able to work together. Sometimes it seems like we’re the same person, but with just enough differences so that we don’t bore each other.

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Still sweeping me off my feet, every day!

I love to write, while he loves to create films, and we’re able to bounce story ideas off each other ridiculously well, which is awesome. I so enjoy being able to do that.

For whatever reason, despite the fact that he doesn’t really like horses, he still encourages me to enjoy that hobby as much as I can – or he will again once I’m no longer pregnant!

He’s always pushing me to be amazing and strong, and trust me, sometimes I want to knock him over the head for it because geez, just let me be pathetic and miserable for once, right? Seriously though, he is very good for me and I don’t think it’s bragging to say that I’ve become a slightly better version of myself over the last year because of him.

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No words, just permanent dance partners!

All of this is to say that I am incredibly happy to be married to this man and I wouldn’t trade a single day. He’s the best friend and partner I could have asked for. I can’t wait to see where life takes us.

I love you, Juan! Here’s to the rest of our lives!


Love and kindness,

Katharine Marie

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A Fairy Tale Kind of Day

A Fairy Tale Kind of Day

Hello beautiful magical beings! Today, instead of rambling and being a little depressed… I’m going to talk about my wedding!

We’re getting close to two months now, and in some ways it feels like it was yesterday. But then sometimes I feel like we’ve been married forever. It’s been an adventure and a rollercoaster, and it’s also been really really freeing and calming.

But that’s about the marriage part… I was going to talk about the actual wedding.

 

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The planning stressed me out WAY too much. But honestly that was mainly my fault because I allowed myself to be stressed out. But I will say that gathering together as many people who were willing to help and had a lot of natural creativity was the best thing ever. I was able to sort of spit out my ideas and have someone else run with it and come up with something amazing that I loved and was better than I could have ever dreamed up on my own.

Locations

I always wanted an outdoor wedding, unless I somehow got lucky enough to get some kind of super cool castle or Elizabethan style hall. But living in this part of Texas, that wasn’t going to happen, so we went with a beautiful lake just outside of town. We were extremely blessed because we planned an outdoor wedding in the middle of August… but somehow it kept raining during the two months beforehand so that everything was green and gorgeous and the weather that day was amazing, only a little uncomfortably warm, instead of dying of heatstroke, which is what we were all worried about. We had a beautiful backdrop with the lake behind us and trees around. Very lovely.

Our reception was held at a local downtown venue that has a slightly modern or industrial look to it. It is a beautiful place on its own, but it also adapts very well to almost any type of décor, which is why I loved it. There were two levels to it so that we had the lower floor for the dinner reception and the upper floor for cake and dancing. It was barely too small for the amount of people that we had, but I absolutely loved it.

 

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Theme & Colors

One of the first things I decided on were my colors. I wanted deep blue and maroon red. What we wanted to do as far as a theme goes took a bit longer to decide on. I wanted vintage and Victorian and fairy tale and garden party and Beauty and the Beast and everything in between. In the end we decided to do the Beauty and the Beast thing with a touch of everything else. I like to think that it turned out very elegant and timeless, which is what I really wanted.

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Wedding Dress

Oh my goodness, I love my dress! I went to several bridal shops to figure out what I really wanted and ended up finding the perfect dress at a consignment shop. It even fit me almost perfectly right off the rack, just needing a bit of hemming. It was a few years/styles back but it was super well made and the beading on it is perfection. I really also loved the train. I originally thought I wanted a ballgown type, tulle skirt, lace top, etc for my wedding dress… but I kept trying them on and not feeling so great about them. This one was amazing and it made me feel like an absolute princess.

My shoes were also one of my favorite things… I actually bought a pair of simple black character shoes that I already knew I loved and dolled them up with a LOT of blue glitter. They were fabulous and super comfortable to wear for the entire evening, which of course made it better because I was able to dance a lot!

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Food

We had a salad and mashed potato bar – and there were multiple people who said that they had been skeptical but ended up loving it! It was really cheap to do and very tasty. My mom was awesome and got the whole thing set up, so we didn’t have to pay any caterers or anything like that. And for our cake we also kept it super simple – we picked out a cake topper that we loved and went with red roses for the rest of the cake decorations. And, to go along with the food, we had real dishes and silverware because that was something that I really wanted to have. To me, it automatically adds an extra level of ‘fancy’ to an event when there are real dishes.

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Decor and Flowers

This is the part that my awesome coordinator/second mom took over on and I had very little to do with, actually. I was mainly involved with the flowers actually – my bouquet turned out amazing and we did a hoop idea for the bridesmaid’s flowers. There were a lot of roses and greenery involved, in keeping with the themes. My mom made a gorgeous macrame hanging that we had for the ceremony and then moved to the reception site for photos. After deciding to do hoops for the bridesmaids, we added a few more in various spots. We also themed each table for one of our interests or hobbies, like Doctor Who, music, theater, film, literature, and so forth. My favorite part about all the decor was the fact that it was completely not what most people are doing in this area right now. I loved every piece of it.

 

I keep falling more in love with J every single day and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him. It’s going to be just as amazing as our wedding day was.

Love, happiness, and all the joy in the world!

Katharine Marie

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Looking Forward

Looking Forward

Hello beautiful, magical people!

At long last, I am back on the internet scene. Finally, I know, don’t remind me about how long it’s been since I last posted anything. *le sigh*

The whole reason I dropped my attempt at blogging a few months back was because it was far too stressful trying to plan our wedding, work a full time job (with whatever overtime I could manage to get) and still try to have a decent social/family life outside of work. It was very overwhelming and stressful for a while and I can’t say I handled it particularly well.

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Even the most difficult journey can be beautiful.  Photo by Omer Salom on Unsplash

 

However. We got MARRIED, we’ve officially moved into our place, and life is FINALLY starting to calm down. I’ve been waiting not-so-patiently to get to a point in the unpacking where I felt relaxed enough to sit down and write this – and I’m actually writing this a week before it posts, so I actually feel ahead of the game for once. Yay!

I am going to write more about the wedding and that process in a later post, but for now we’ll say that it was the best day of my life. I didn’t think it was possible to love someone more than I did before the wedding, but as always, I’ve been proved wrong. I love my husband more every day – and yes, I know how horribly cliche that sounds, but it is also the truth. He’s been gently pushing me to get back to writing for a while now and I feel so blessed that I found someone who refuses to let me give up on anything. We’re pretty good for each other, if I do say so myself.

I wish there was more to say about everything that I’ve been up to lately, but honestly that’s about it. I’ve been so focused on the process of getting married that there just hasn’t been time for much else. I’m started to get excited now about the prospect of getting back to the projects that I love. I want to start playing piano again, reading more books, keeping my planner in order, decorating my house, participating in (and winning!) NaNoWriMo, and just working on writing projects in general again. It all sounds fantastic.

Having said that, I do plan to go back to posting here every week, and hopefully I’ll get six blog posts written every month. That’s the goal anyways. I would love to say that I’m just going to jump straight back in with all the social media posting and the super planned posts and all the extras. Yeah, that’s not going to happen. It never happens overnight and it’s going to be a slow process of building this thing up again.

There are a few things I want to accomplish over the rest of this year. Only four more months, can you believe it?!

I still want to finish another book this year – not necessarily published or anything like that, but having a completed manuscript would be awesome. Finishing any kind of project is an accomplishment for me, honestly! And winning NaNoWriMo is also included in this, since hopefully it will help me reach that goal of finishing a manuscript.

I also intend to implement several more lifestyle changes in my daily life. I want to continue keeping our apartment tidy and pretty, so that it becomes a warm and wonderful place to come home to. I want to improve my cooking skills and start working out on a regular basis – being healthier is always a good idea! I also want to make time on a regular basis for the creative projects that I enjoy doing sot hat I can feel more fulfilled again with my life (and that includes blogging!).

The biggest one though, in my mind, is that throughout the next four months, I want to work on embracing my emotional side and becoming more in tune with myself. Hopefully improving myself in those areas will help me become better at working through problems, I’ll be able to get even closer to my husband, and I will start loving myself more again. I’ve come to the conclusion recently that me not accepting who and what I am has been the real issue in my life for the last while. I think working on this will also kick-start my creative drive again – or at least that’s the plan!

There are a lot more things that I want to do over the next few months, of course, but that covers the main things that I’ve been thinking about lately. Besides blogging, of course! As you can probably see, I’ve changed up a few things about the website and the focus has also changed slightly, but it’s still the same me, and the same ideas!

I’ll be back next week with more content and a more complete website, so come back for more!

Love and kindness,

Katharine Marie.png

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